Tag Archives: chocolate cake

To Eat or Not To Eat

I have a question to all you women out there. Which would make you the most happy, to eat all the delicious food you want, be chubby and layer your clothing to hide those bulging areas on your body (thank God for LLR) or maintain a strict diet while salivating over your coworkers food, exercise…A LOT, BUT be able to buy trendy clothes and look hot in them? For me, it’s a difficult question to answer. I’ve been fat, thin, fat, thin, fat, thin all my life. When I’m thin, I absolutely love buying clothes and not  worrying about wearing something baggy enough to conceal my love handles and saddlebags. BUT I’m not happy when my stomach is always growling, eating tiny, unreasonable portions and missing out on chocolate cake and donuts. BUT I am happy to throw on an outfit and have it fit perfectly in all the right places. There’s a lot of BUT(T)s going on here, both in my head and the rather large one just below my back.

When I’m more on (I’ll be kind to myself and say) the voluptuous side, I pull out the shapewear, control top pantyhose, tunics (to cover my bootie) and wide belts. This somehow makes me feel more secure even though I’m hotter than hell wearing all this shit. When I’m thin, all I need underneath my dress is a pair of thong undies (too much info?) and I’m good to go. BUT again, I can’t eat too much (or at all) otherwise that form-fitting dress, with buttons down to my waist will start popping open.

Our priorities definitely change as we age, which then leads me to say that I don’t care what people think and I’ll just be fat and eat whatever. BUT that still doesn’t make me feel better. Then I think, ok I’ll get my BUTT in gear and start working out and eating less. Then here comes the crazy obsession again, where I weigh myself constantly, workout any chance I get, eat like a bird BUT look in that mirror and think, DAMN, GIRL!

Ok, so I really haven’t answered my own question. BUT, there’s always makeup and hair. Whether I’m Miss Piggy or Jessica Rabbit (minus the boobs) my beauty routine always works.

Oh one more thing, I know there will be people who say eating right and exercising is better for your overall health. Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, I know but that still doesn’t make it any easier.  Maybe I need to get to a point in my life where the person I see in my mirror right this moment (I’m laughing as I type this) is good enough. I’m so not there yet.

Please share your thoughts!  Which would you rather?